It’s been well–documented on the internet that I’m partial to a bold makeup look—I’m an all or nothing gal who either wants to roll out of bed and put on sunscreen, or wear as many colors on my face as I can. That’s just how I can feel like myself the most. But what about you? I’ve been talking about myself so much I think I forgot to ask. Maybe you’re thinking, “Ali, that’s all well and good, but you haven’t quite sold me on the colorful makeup thing yet.” Well, in case you missed it, this week is New York Fashion Week—a whole seven days for half of the best makeup artists in the biz to convince you to try cool, creative makeup (the other half are still doing no makeup-makeup). As it comes to a close, I’ve rounded up five of my favorite looks that I urge—no, beg you to wear in the next few months. Maybe, say, to one of these imaginary parties? As long as you BYO NYFW-inspired face, you’re invited to all of them. Why not do…
What you’ll need:
An orange-y red creamy multiple to apply just on the lid until the crease, and something yellow and blendable to take the color up to the brow. An eye gloss over your lid finishes the look.
Try:
Where you’re going:
A summer-themed bar with a freezing patio and no coat check. Why is it always this way? And more importantly, how do the potted palm trees get enough light in here and who is in charge of watering them? They’ve got loads of fun cocktails with all sorts of rosy-hued fruit juices (pineapple! cranberry! orange! peach!) but everyone’s drinking shots or milking nearly flat beers. The tunes are old Rihanna (and I mean old—like, Pon de Replay old) and remixes of The Beach Boys, and all of your friends are busting out moves on the dance floor while trying to dodge unwanted advances from strangers. This night isn’t about that! Those who aren’t dancing are perched high on the row of plush-upholstered booths to take selfies closer to the lights. You find your light, girl, you say aloud to no one in particular. And it is pretty good light for a selfie—all pink and yellow, exactly like your eye makeup. The sign out front said there’d be a pool, but it turns out to just be a pool table, and you leave around 2AM.
What you’ll need:
Stick-on craft rhinestones, applied from the front of your brows to the tails.
Try:
Where you’re going:
A potluck cards night with just your closest friends, who won’t find it strange at all that you’ve decided to adhere sticky rhinestones along your forehead hairs. A reasonable, sensical makeup look for a Thursday! You don’t even have foundation on! The thing is, if they’ve seen you through your college sidebangs phase, they can certainly handle you at your glitter brows. And a jab or two at your personal decisions upon entry is nothing that can’t be smoothed over with a round of Settlers of Catan and whatever new recipe your friend and NYT Cooking devotee Rachel decided to whip up and bring. (Is it this Alison Roman one? Or this one?) As the dessert buffet gets set up, a friend sits down next to you and starts absentmindedly stroking your little rhinestone studded brows. Is everyone drunk or are they kind of… a hit? The group tosses around ideas about going somewhere post-potluck, but everyone’s tired and worried about their tupperware. You’ll be home by 10PM.
What you’ll need:
Just those stick-on rhinestones again! Apply various sizes all over your face.
Where you’re going:
A pay-to-play disco party you had to buy tickets to at least a week in advance. It’s not your usual thing, but those who’ve attended before swear it’s going to be worth it. And said something about cage dancers and topless ladies? It basically sounds like Studio 54. The music is Diana Ross! And Donna Summer! And Gloria Gaynor! Maybe even a little ABBA! So it’s apropos to turn your face into a literal disco ball, and, one could argue, even a bit selfless—in moments where the refracted light of the disco ball doesn’t illuminate the crowd, your bouncing, glittery punim will! But, OK, here’s the catch: under those rhinestones? A gnarly breakout. Maybe your worst ever. Possibly due to an overly stressful two weeks at work and subsequent diet of takeout pizza and bulk-boxed Costco snacks. Luckily, the rhinestones cover those babies right up—you can even layer them over pimple patches, for an acne treatment that’s not just a pretty face. Disco is glamour and glamour is concealing your zits with sparkles. And until you sweat off all their adhesive on the dance floor, you’re not going home (you’ll soak your sore feet in a warm bathtub at 3AM).
What you’ll need:
Gel eyeliner in a pot that you can draw thick lines with on your top and bottom lash lines. Flick your top one out like a regular cat eye, and draw a parallel (but not touching!) one below it. For gamine lower lashes, use individual falsies glued on in clumps. Remember to use a tweezer for better placement, and to let the glue dry a bit before sticking on. Finish with red lipstick.
Try:
Where you’re going:
An after-dark museum event you got invited to because of that one time you didn’t feel like waiting in line for tickets and just bought a membership instead. It wasn’t expensive, and now you’re a patron of the arts. And feeling quite the cooler for it! You imagine that this nighttime event at the museum is going to be filled with art world Lotharios and insouciant gallery girls, but in reality it’s just you and lots of other regular people who, like you, happen to have museum memberships. Luckily, the art-savvy friend you brought along is having an absolute blast navigating you through the exhibits, because the champagne is mostly water and the hors d’oeuvres are mostly cheese cubes. Your moody makeup is starting to look at home on your now-jaded and relatively bored face. And, OK, you do like the art… but you’ll be home by 9PM.
What you’ll need:
A bright white or silvery-white highlighter, dusted where your brow bone meets your nose. Blend up and outwards into the forehead, across your brows, down onto the bridge of your nose, and into the corners of your eyes.
Try:
Where you’re going:
A shabby bar where your high school crush is playing with his band. Did you know he had a band? Or that he even played the bass? And also, are you aware that he’s been learning to make sourdough? He has a lot of free time since he’s been avoiding employment as a means to extricate himself from capitalism. How he pays for his apartment you’re still shaky on, though he only texts you to tell you about gigs so you’ll probably never know. The bar has a good shiny-accents-to-dirty-floor ratio, and the bartenders are friendly and feel neighborhoody. And say what you will about said high school crush, but he sure does have a lot of friends—does everyone here know someone in the band? You’ll sway with [insert nostalgic drink of choice] in your hand to the actually not totally horrible music, and hope the rotating rainbow light ball reflects some of the shine off of your forehead. It’s attention-getting, sure, but at least it’s visible from on-stage. He really is as cute as you remember… you’ll get home in the morning.
—Ali Oshinsky
Photos via Getty.
